Wednesday, 30 April 2014



Common pals, lets give ourselves a break and really bear with each other's clumsiness on this last but one day for this year's challenge right?

Let me hide behind me Newbeeness (my vocab) and Wannabeeness and zzzzzzz myself off.

I am out of random thoughts and all I wanna do is:

It's been tough and I challenged myself and wrote/scheduled my #AtoZ Challenge posts in 3 shots so see You all Next Year oh no see you soonest! And oh, I have 3 copies of my book to giveaway so if you happen to hop by here and want one then reach out somehow!

Tuesday, 29 April 2014

Y as in ...


Come on pals which is the next to easiest word to pronounce in this whole universe?

Well for me, it is YES. Em I know I posted somewhere about the word NO so it is logical that I challenge that post with this one right? It makes sense!

So lets have some fun as we wrap up and actually run out of - Yes; more ideas!

Oh YES I did it, oh YES I want, Oh YES please do, Wow YES it was great!

I just wished I could have found a Yes Woman picture; but well, I am sticking to this neutral one which has a message for me:

There is more after this #AtoZ Challenge month, the relationships made have to be nurtured and YES I AM READY AND WILLING!

Monday, 28 April 2014

X as in


Yes, as the noble #AtoZ Challenge draws to an end well like officially for 2014, I have chosen a 'big' word to post about. I mean it is what we call in french 'la dernier ligne droit' right? (The last lane sort of)

I looked up the word and this is what I found on the oxford dictionary

Intense or irrational dislike or fear of people from other countries:"racism and xenophobia are steadily growing in Europe"

Wow, so am I in for trouble by relocating to Europe?
Am I safer just staying home and trying to work only online so people hardly get to see me on the streets and notice my colour or find out my country of origin?
When I first got a job, I would greet my colleagues cheerfully each day like we do back home but hell no wait a minute - is this back home? So I am adjusting!
I am challenging myself and dare I add us all, to not let any such creepy 'thoughts' steal precious space in our 'up there'!

Saturday, 26 April 2014

The Divorce Magazine with Author Marie Abanga (My Hurts, My Adulteries, ...

Part two of my interview by Soila of the Divorce Magazine. If you missed the first part you could just follow this link

In these series of interviews; I talk about my book, my life and more.

I think I am one of those Phenomenal woman my W post for the noble #atozchallenge2013 seeks to celebrate.

Do watch, enjoy, take away something and leave any feedback if you may!

W as in ...


Yes W as in woman for which human being would exist on this planet if not born of a woman?

I am a woman and proud to be; I know it isn't easy for us and so I write this post as a throw back challenge to us all. I wish we don't round up this noble #AtoZ Challenge without taking away some real food for thoughts.

Come to think of if, is a woman a pride or a plight? We all know all the terrible things done to women in this world so I wouldn't add anymore.

Yet let's appreciate this beautiful poem even if only for the pretty poetry it is: An excerpt from the most distinguished Maya Angelou's Phenomenal Woman

"Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.

I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size 
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips, 
The stride of my step, 
The curl of my lips. 
I’m a woman
Phenomenal woman, 
That’s me..."

Friday, 25 April 2014

Be a Woman of Courage and Face Your Fears

Be a Woman of Courage and Face Your Fears

I am honoured to be featured in my friend June's post. Yes this one of those friends you make in the blogging world and they mean the world indeed to you - well as far as the world goes huh?

In her post, June talks to us from her heart and life's story. She also gives us some ideas about how we could go about deciding our present stories wouldn't have the same ending.

To me, it all boils down to our interpretation and understanding of the word FEAR


V as in


I posted last about Universal wrongs and rights but today I wish to ponder about what is in every individual that makes him an integral being.

I know society has values, families have values too, and of course communities, religions and all have same. But what interests me is an individual's values.

Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value. Albert Einstein

Personally, I have decided to be a woman of value to live life on my own values and not as dictated or advocated by anyone whomsoever.

As the #AtoZ Challenge draws to an introductory end and announces 2015, I am committed to participate with more value!

Thursday, 24 April 2014

U as in ...


I have come to realize that there are more universal values which unite us here below than there aren't.

I didn't know a lot about the universality of rights and wrongs until a couple of years ago.

I thought only africans hated their fellow country men, I thought only African men beat their wives, I thought only African Heads of States were dictators. Wow, I was wrong - there are several universal wrongs than we may have wished.

So, when I left my marriage because I had been sufficiently abused just as much as I had abused my own self and others, and when I arrived in Belgium and heard, read and got to know women like myself, I came to the conclusion that Universality was for real.

But, there are equally universal rights I have read of and I just wish those could bond us more as human beings than our differences. It shouldn't matter where we come from, what colour, faith and more we have provided we are humans with a common vision of living life to its fullest.

I am so glad I signed up for this #AtoZ Challenge and my first theme is on random thoughts so I can flirt with some universal issues!

Wednesday, 23 April 2014

The Divorce Magazine with Author Marie Abanga

The start of a thrilling series of interviews by my humble self with Soila of the divorce magazine.

T as in ...

Thank you

I mean, were I to finish this #AtoZ Challenge without expressing my gratitude with a post, then that would be so mean I think or don't you? (I know there are 6 more days to go hahaha)

There are those 3 or so little words I have personally come to confirm that people are so scare to use. You know them I am sure and they are Please, Sorry and Thank You.

Yet, using those words really don't harm or reduce anything of our might, height and weight or so I think.

Using those words for me, increase our sense of worthiness, our esteem, our ego, our humaneness or so I think.

I use it even with kids because they deserve it too and men that's how they learn best or so I think.

I use it with my pals too and even with those who feel they have that superiority complex which keeps them at the expecting end and gives them the 'right' not to use the word.

I want to Thank Arlee Bird and the dynamic team of hosts, mignons and all for this opportunity to find my own little corner on this 'Mighty' Platform.

I want to thank all those who have ventured onto this blog or who just scroll through it in their reader. Oh I dare not forget those who left a comment or two somewhere and on whose pretty blogs l have also been able to hop to and leave a hopefully nice little comment.

Tuesday, 22 April 2014

S as in ...


The world is today full with horrible happenings and untold tales of massacres, killings, abuses of all sorts and name them. Simply put, it is unsafe to even venture into any other 'land' known or unknown.

Women and Children are the greatest victims.

Coming to us in this noble #AtoZ Challenge, how safe do we even feel to say hello to our 'neighbour'.

Yes, safety is very important and there isn't much we can do if we don't feel safe. Actually, we can't love right if we feel unsafe and insecure.

Yet I think in our little way, we could do something to face those fears of imminent danger or install some more safety in our 'world'. We could each ponder about this and then decide on appropriate actions by setting ourselves little goal... 

Monday, 21 April 2014

R as in ...


Wow, week three of the #AtoZ Challenge it is time for more serious stuff right?

So on this monday I will take on a risk to raise my bar and talk more about greater input to get a greater output!

Simply put, he who doesn't risk anything doesn't get anything.

A lot has been said about this and there is a lot of material online and in lots of written works challenging us all to be brave enough to make more investments and yes even risky one (after all what is not risky? Even child birth is right?)

I will just share a little experience of mine which is kind of a private risk but which is paying off emotionally now if I may put it this way.

When I came to Belgium, I knew I needed to find a boyfriend, lover or partner call it which ever. Yet I had to risk going online because I waited three months and nobody talked to me a frightful black woman just landed on the streets.

Simply, I took that risk and today I have a Super Hero in my life!

Saturday, 19 April 2014

Q as in ...


I grew up always reminded that I should keep quiet often because I asked too many questions.

My father sometimes fabricated details to answer my numerous questions as to where we were, where we were going, why we were going there and so on and so forth.

Yes, my curiosity was greatly frowned upon. But lets ponder together what we will all become if we were not curious and could not question our surrounding, our relationships, our education and yes even our own religions.

So, as for me, and hopefully for us all henceforth as we wade this #AtoZ Challenge, may we ask these questions always:

Because I believe in this:

Friday, 18 April 2014

P as in ...


So today, on this umpteenth day of this noble #AtoZ Challenge, I am happy and will write about people.

Well, we can't live without people right? What is life without someone to share it with? Afterall, is man not a social animal?

As for me, I to be happy all the way and life makes more meaning to me living with and for PEOPLE!

Now, my post is more of about the kind of people we should watch out and stay away from, I mean say NO to and open all our senses to identifying them and fleeing away from them like from a deadly virus.

May this video from Les Brown one of the greatest motivational speakers of our time give us a greater insight and conclude this post of mine - I am talking about TOXIC PEOPLE!

Thursday, 17 April 2014

O as in ...


Yesterday I posted on this cool word NO and I said I have decided to use the word as much as any other. So today I want to say I will be Open minded and no longer tow the line.

I will open my spirit to other teachings and open my heart to new loves and ways of living. 

Oh yes, wait a minute I will open up to the world and the various cultures I can muster.

I had for so long lived under the constraints and restraints of cultural prerogatives, religious dogmas and much more; What I can do, not do, and may do if and only if... fill the dots.

Life to me now makes more sense. 

I have opened up my innermost self to the world and written it all in a book. I am now open to embrace more challenges and yes without hesitation. It is like I am starting again and to me, this #AtoZ Challenge is just one of those!

Wednesday, 16 April 2014

N as in ...


Hell no right? For once since this #AtoZ Challenge, I will use a negative word!

Wait a second, is it only a negative word simply because you dare say no when you are expected to say yes?

What is wrong, it is a word like every other so why not use it as often as you would use any other?

If you can't stand the abuse, say NO and get the hell out!

If you can't stand the Challenge, say NO and strike yourself out!

If you can't take the blame, face the shame or accept responsibility when you really didn't do nothing, then hell no just scream NO!

Say no to that mean inner voice trying to convince you you aren't worth it!

Scream NO to anyone who tries to tell you you aren't going to make it to the end of this Challenge or any other one you pick up and engage in in this life.

Well, as for me, I will use the word NO as often as I please for Yes I am done trying to please everyone and do it all and fight it all, and face it all and much more...

Tuesday, 15 April 2014

M as in ...


Oh come on, who doesn't love money? Who doesn't chase money? I mean even a junkie needs at least a dollar for a joint or whatever!

Since I promised myself that each of my post will have some personal stuff to it, I want to write about my brushes and love affairs with Money.

I have dated 'rich' (like who had more money) and 'poor' men alike but strangely enough, my best 'affairs' were with the 'poor' men.

I have lived with less than two dollars a day in Dubai and I now make more than two dollars a day in Brussels. Yet, my life was much more 'peaceful' in Dubai than here.

Maybe the only thing I really like about money is that it helps us solve problems, take care of our kids and offer ourselves treats every now and then.

But helas, when money itself becomes a source of problems, when money takes away your sleep, when money cannot buy you Love, then we need to reconsider our affinity to it. 

This is my challenge on this umpteenth day of the noble #AtoZ Challenge.

Monday, 14 April 2014

Welcome To The Grind (Motivation)

It sure is our choice and I choose that!

L as in ...


Yes, I start off week three of this noble #AtoZ Challenge with a post on Love. 
We all know so much about this magic word right?

I will write instead about a special kind of love, Unconditional Love. I will even stretch by thinking of Unconventional Love. To me, I would rather have people show it to me than say it to me. 

When I gathered the courage and the inner love to face my demons and burry them all in a most unconventional book, I started to get the difference between Love and Unconditional Love.

Hmm, from where I expected the love to be unconditional, it was most subjective. Well, as for me, I will continue to Love and Love unconditionally. Who am I to 'judge' anyway. 

I venture to challenge myself and us all for I sincerely think there is much more benefit in Loving than in Hating for anyone to waste time otherwise? Unless, you love this picture?

Saturday, 12 April 2014

K as in ...


Wow, I survive week two of the #AtoZ Challenge and what better to do a post on what makes me thrive?

Yes, my kids are my future. For them I work hard. I don't know what I would have done without them. Yet, Mine may probably be a sad tale for I have left those same kids behind in a country oceans away and in a home and marriage I fled from.

I nevertheless know all this is but temporal and that while I hope and cope, someday it would be much better. I talk about each of them in my famous and unconventional book and I mean, who will not survive on drawings such as these?

Today more than ever, we can't afford to 'ignore' our kids by assuming they are just 'kids' and so better off seen than heard - this is my challenge no matter the distance!

Friday, 11 April 2014

Rythmz - A Little Lie A Little Kill Official Video (An Adrenaline Film)

Some Music from my beloved country Cameroon as we enter the weekend mood!

J as in ...


Yes, I think 10 days into this exciting #AtoZ Challenge, I can happily post on Jokes.

I have a constant source of jokes and that is my first son. He in particular often concludes his letters to me with a joke. I think he feels I need them and I am most appreciative. I have also learnt to start writing him jokes too and he loves them too.

So, here is something interesting l found on jokes;

Georg Christoph Lichtenberg said : “A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.” 

This probably tells us what jokes could reveal to us in addition to what they could equally do to us and our moods and our cheer. I love jokes and I love to laugh. On one of my google pages, my background reads that: 

And this I know, that jokes could help us get there...

And so once more, I leave you with this joke I found out there and which I hope you will find funny too: 

Thursday, 10 April 2014

I as in ...


l wrote and encouraged us all to always Hope barely 24 hours ago, and here I am writing on Insecurities? 

Well yes because the insecurities we deal with in life, have, hang on to or have shoved our way, impair our ability to even hope or live a meaningful life.

Yes, this is a good quote I found on insecurities:

I personally have had and still have to deal with lots of insecurity. Insecurity in various relationships and circumstances, intellectually, professionally and socially. I wanted so badly to 'Belong', to be 'approved' to be 'conventional'.

I know some what insecurity can do, I have a whole book on how I lived parallel lives thanks largely to my insecurities which I couldn't face.

So, on this day of the #AtoZ Challenge, I challenge myself and us all to face them those insecurities and to this end, I appreciate the insecure writers group I stumbled on. Although I sort for notice in that group to no avail, I dealt with that and no longer feel insecure as a writer. They however have lots of useful resources which I will use and well I will try getting noticed again. I therefore think it is up to us...

Wednesday, 9 April 2014

H as in ...


I mean what is a more befitting H letter post I could possibly write on in this first brush with the #AtoZ Challenge?

I hope and really have high hope about this Challenge, the outcome of my participation and my blogging and other ventures moving on.

Think of it, what will life mean if we took hope away. I remember even the religious trio which says Faith, Hope and Charity although they say Charity is the greatest of all.

Well, as for me, if I don't Hope even in the moral satisfaction I will get in being Charitable, I wouldn't be. I wouldn't have Faith and act on it if I didn't Hope in a positive outcome for my life and whatever it was I undertaking or looking forward to.

So, lets not loose hope and lets challenge ourselves to hold on or move on even when it pains to do so for that is the true meaning of HOPE!

Tuesday, 8 April 2014

G as in ...


Well, I think it is but logical that I think of writing about doing something good for ourselves, for myself and for the world.

I don't know about you, but I feel good when I take up Challenges like the #AtoZ Challenge. Hmm, I remember signing up for this and what I posted on this very blog soon thereafter or when I revealed my theme on March 21st.

As I write and schedule my posts, I have only one follower but there has been a total of around 484 views so far and that makes me feel good.

I even did much more, I wrote and published a book, my own book about my own life and my unconventional loves and oh how good I feel.

The Challenge for me however and for us all I dare, is to work towards having it better and why not getting it best. 

Good is good, but we could get it Great if we challenge ourselves...

Monday, 7 April 2014

F as in ...


I am glad to start my week two of the #AtoZ Challenge with a post on family.

Today, many families are at dagger drawn. Some will use terms like dysfunctional or mono parental or same sex couple families and what have you.

Families like mine are spread all over the globe, hmm it is tough just to keep in touch. The family I even tried to create by a six year marriage, crumbled right under my own nose leaving so many innocent  victims in its tsunamis.

Yet, love must prevail and we must not only love online or our new blogger families and all the like. No, I dare Challenge myself and us all to think seriously about it. Surely, the notion of Family isn't anymore like in the 'Sicily Mafia era' but I dare think we could try a little bit more...

Saturday, 5 April 2014

Trailer To My Thriller - Episode 2

I am loving myself and my undertakings more and more each day, and you?

E as in ...


Yes, Today is the fifth day of the #AtoZ Challenge, the end of week one,  and I want to write about Women's Empowerment.

What the fuss some have often asked me? Well, simply because I think I and surely several other Women have had enough:

Enough of the second, third, fourth and last class treatment whereas we make up over half of the world's population and give birth to the other half.

Enough of all the abuse, you name them (Sexual, physical, mental, emotional, sociological, and ...). I am a victim both individually and collectively.

Enough of all the dis-empowerment all in the name of Cultures, traditions and religions!

Time for action is now more than ever. Women suffer most as a result of Wars, Conflicts, Poverty and you name the rest.

Economically, socially, emotionally and all other 'lys', it is time Women took themselves seriously and the men gave or supported our 'struggle' or know no peace! 

I am a Community Champion for Women's Economic Empowerment, the Regional Manager Africa with the Women In Parliament Global Forum, and much more. I am a feminist and Proud to Be!

Friday, 4 April 2014

D as in ...


I will say, Dare 2 Dare. If we don't dare in life, we could hardly fare. Well, so I think and challenge myself to do time and again.

When I came to Belgium a year ago, I was told by many to just try to survive the way they advised. I was told I was black and no good dreaming in this world. I was told America was better and that even to go there, I had to work very very hard.

So this is what I did, I remembered coming across this 

 and I decided I wanted that special magic. I Dared to Dream and then I Dared to Dare. I applied for those 'jobs' and and Dared asked for a wage. Guess what, I got more than those!

So, on this day of the #AtoZ Challenge, and to those of us still finding reason to sit back and complain about how tough life is, why don't we instead Dare to Dream and Do something that will allow us to feel and get the MAGIC!

Thursday, 3 April 2014

C as in ...


Why should I Care to write about Care? Why should you Care to read what I write about Care? What authority do I have to write about Care? How much do I know or Care enough to advocate for us all to Care some more.

Well, I will keep it concise and precise. 
I Care because Life makes more sense to me when I do. I Care because I love life and all what I find here below. 

You should Care too because life is one big puzzle
 and if we don't Care, then we will never solve nor even attempt to solve that puzzle nor mean a damn to any other person.

Now, Care is a Challenge to us all and we all know how, when and why. The world today seems to care more for pets and gadgets than for their fellow human being.  

Although I may have little or no authority other than my frail and human nature - being, I know and have been through quiet a lot and equally seen and read much more which leaves me concluding that if only we cared a little bit more... a lot of blood will be saved and this to fits in with the great #AtoZ Challenge!

Wednesday, 2 April 2014

B as in ...

Black Man's Time (BMT)

The Urban dictionary defines this as "A very relaxed concept of time, as used by black people the world over... aiming to get somewhere at 1 when it starts at 12 and actually get there at 2.30"

I have trouble with the whole notion of the so called BMT and hence I make it my day two post for the #AtoZ Challenge. 

I am Black but I sincerely don't remember having a time different from that of the rest of the world nor being very relaxed about the concept of time so to speak.  

I remember arriving in Church for my wedding even before the priest and my groom just because I hate this concept. I had scheduled to publish my book latest March 1st 2014 and I worked very hard and got it published on the 22nd of February. To me, time is of the essence and we already have sufficient timezones to start including "BMTs and so on".

So, I am not only challenging myself throughout this month to finish this challenge and post at 01:00 each day, but I am equally challenging whoever comes across my post to revisit their punctuality. I will argue with facts that there are some whites who adhere to BMT even more than Blacks!

Tuesday, 1 April 2014

A as in ...

I start off the #A toZ Challenge in a most unconventional way. Or so I think and hope after all, what do I have to loose?

 I am unconventional, I am an adulterous woman or rather I was. I got married for the wrong reasons, well as wrong as not getting married out of Love but because I was looking for a refuge.

Hmm, it got so hot in there that I found another 'refuge' out there. Yes, in the arms of other men. I did it once, then twice then a few more times and each time with different men. That was Adultery big time.

I am lawyer and could defend myself if caught and sued; yet, Adultery is not a 'crime' if you aren't caught and prosecuted. Adultery to me is not even a Sin, for as much as I am not religious. Yes, Adultery to me is a plain moral outrageous thing to do.

So, when I caught myself in those despicable acts and could face myself no more, I fled. I fled the marriage, ran away from my own kids (left them behind in that same marriage), and left the country all together.

I speak up today and have a whole book about it not only as a mea culpa, but as a call for action that society needs to start thinking more about about the causes and effect of this canker worm ...!